CryptoSanta: Difference between revisions

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(Created page with "'''CryptoSanta''' is the fifth and final track of Lemon Demon's 2012 Extended Play, I Am Become Christmas. {{Infobox_song |title = CryptoSanta |artist = Lemon Demon |year = 2012 |albumart = IABC.jpeg |writer = Neil Cicierega |singer = Neil Cicierega |album = I Am Become Christmas |duration = 03:38 |tempo = 172 |genre = Rock, Christmas |externalLinks = [https://lemondemon.bandcamp.com/track/aurora-borealis Bandcamp] [https://n...")
 
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  |tempo =  172  
  |tempo =  172  
  |genre =  Rock, Christmas  
  |genre =  Rock, Christmas  
  |externalLinks =  [https://lemondemon.bandcamp.com/track/aurora-borealis Bandcamp] [https://needlejuice.bandcamp.com/track/cryptosanta Needlejuice Remaster] [https://youtu.be/CHfSLmbBAYM?si=negoODO9nfGh2Gou YouTube] [https://open.spotify.com/track/6x7zWxv1f8GyrIEDxOtqP2?si=mZFIOBxETuGRGbTACfnHtA Spotify]
  |externalLinks =  [https://lemondemon.bandcamp.com/track/cryptosanta Bandcamp] [https://needlejuice.bandcamp.com/track/cryptosanta Needlejuice Remaster] [https://youtu.be/CHfSLmbBAYM?si=negoODO9nfGh2Gou YouTube] [https://open.spotify.com/track/6x7zWxv1f8GyrIEDxOtqP2?si=mZFIOBxETuGRGbTACfnHtA Spotify]
}}
}}


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==Lyrics==
==Lyrics==
<nowiki>
  Classified project: Moving Light
  Classified project: Moving Light
  Privately funded Silent Night
  Privately funded Silent Night
Line 30: Line 29:
  For the children
  For the children
  In the trillions
  In the trillions
 
  With a little bit of brains
  With a little bit of brains
  Maybe we can do away
  Maybe we can do away
Line 51: Line 50:
  (As seen on TV)
  (As seen on TV)
  It's a miracle it hasn't happened yet
  It's a miracle it hasn't happened yet
 
  Oh god.
  Oh god.
  Something went wrong
  Something went wrong
Line 59: Line 58:
  But overnight,
  But overnight,
  My hair turned white
  My hair turned white
 
  I've been gaining weight
  I've been gaining weight
  Involuntary spasms
  Involuntary spasms
Line 68: Line 67:
  The shareholders
  The shareholders
  That would be bad
  That would be bad
 
  Woah-oh, Something to do with DNA
  Woah-oh, Something to do with DNA
  Something to do with gamma rays
  Something to do with gamma rays
  White flowing beard won't go away
  White flowing beard won't go away
  Go away!
  Go away!
 
  Laser beams from outer space
  Laser beams from outer space
  Converging on my mutant face
  Converging on my mutant face
Line 80: Line 79:
  Like Pandora
  Like Pandora
  Oh the horror!
  Oh the horror!
 
  Body horror
  Body horror
  Tendons snapping
  Tendons snapping
Line 89: Line 88:
  Something is growing!
  Something is growing!
  Something-
  Something-
 
  Oh-oh-oh!
  Oh-oh-oh!
  Ah ah ah ah
  Ah ah ah ah
Line 96: Line 95:
   
   
  Merry Christmas!
  Merry Christmas!
</nowiki>


==Trivia==
==Trivia ==  
* This song features parts in 4/4, 5/4, and 6/4. Most of it, however, is in 5/4.
*This song features parts in 4/4, 5/4, and 6/4. Most of it, however, is in 5/4.

Latest revision as of 19:15, 24 August 2026

CryptoSanta is the fifth and final track of Lemon Demon's 2012 Extended Play, I Am Become Christmas.

CryptoSanta
IABC.jpeg
Song
Artist Lemon Demon
Released 2012
Written by Neil Cicierega
Appears on I Am Become Christmas
Sung by Neil Cicierega
Duration 03:38
Tempo 172
Genre Rock, Christmas
Links: Bandcamp Needlejuice Remaster YouTube Spotify


Description

This song is about a mad scientist turning into a robotic version of Santa Claus. It features intense, gorey details.

Lyrics

Classified project: Moving Light
Privately funded Silent Night
North Pole-stationed satellite
Red and white

Laser beams are focusing,
Converging on a tyrant king
New dimensions 
Full of presents
For the children
In the trillions

With a little bit of brains
Maybe we can do away
With a lack of candy canes
Make Christmas every day
Through scientific enterprise
Maybe we can open eyes
We can revolutionize
The way we move merchandise

(It keeps on giving, it keeps on giving)
No more naughty,
No more nice,
(It keeps on giving, it keeps on giving)
Just a present,
And a prize!
(As seen on TV, as seen on TV)
It's a pillow,
It's a pet,
(As seen on TV)
It's a miracle it hasn't happened yet

Oh god.
Something went wrong
I can't let you see me like this!
I walked through the path of the beam
At first I thought I was okay
But overnight,
My hair turned white

I've been gaining weight
Involuntary spasms
Like a bowl
Full of jelly...
Outbursts of laughter
We must not tell
The shareholders
That would be bad

Woah-oh, Something to do with DNA
Something to do with gamma rays
White flowing beard won't go away
Go away!

Laser beams from outer space
Converging on my mutant face
New dimensions
Now I'm presents!
Like Pandora
Oh the horror!

Body horror
Tendons snapping
Ribbons and wrapping
Stocking stuffing
Skin is sloughing
Bones are bowing
Something is growing!
Something-

Oh-oh-oh!
Ah ah ah ah
Oh-oh-oh
Ooh-ee-ooh

Merry Christmas!

Trivia

  • This song features parts in 4/4, 5/4, and 6/4. Most of it, however, is in 5/4.